As my teacher once told me, as you climb higher so the falls too become greater. I am feeling this truth as I try and meet the demands and struggles challenging us at every step. The landlord at the shop is demanding rent yet I am having trouble meeting it as business has suffered in my absence. I have been very busy trying to manage the new land and the builders and the growth of our business. Money is available but tied up with various bank bureaucracy and disappearing fast as unexpected costs arise during building. (We just found out yesterday we need double the amount of gravel with which to fill the giant hole in the road to our lot, without which we cannot access our land in order to build further). The land workers are also concerned about these delays as the longer the holes in our foundation sit open, the greater the risk that rain will come and set construction (and costs) back further. Rain can also make the entire foundation unstable. Construction remains a very dangerous job in Nepal and these fears are not unwarranted.
I have big dreams and in my heart I know I can achieve them: A home and collective with room for more women to be free and self-reliant, within which we can continue to grow and thrive and sustain ourselves independently. I have never chosen the 'easy-way' as the easy way is not always the right way. I guess the hardest part is doing this alone- there is no one I can look to as an example. What we are doing is so new, causing others to resist and doubt our abilities at every step. Some are even intimidated and angry. It can be very exhausting and isolating following your dream when it goes against the normal operations of a conservative and fearful society. I just hope that one day I can be an example for other women to turn to, so that they are reminded we are not alone. Together, we can build a new world, no longer divided and afraid, but sharing in our strength and dreams. We are powerful, and together nothing can stop us. One step at a time.